


Ragged Wings

by Jenshih_Blue



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Episode Related, Gen, Season/Series 09, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-02
Updated: 2013-12-02
Packaged: 2018-01-03 06:30:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1067183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jenshih_Blue/pseuds/Jenshih_Blue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Long ago, Ezekiel knew there would come a time when his destiny would come to unfold, but never had he imagined it would do so with such violence. Now he finds himself stranded on Earth, in the middle of a war, and inhabiting someone who understands far more than most. Ezekiel is far more than any of them could imagine, but Sam knows what it can be like to hide from the truth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ragged Wings

**Author's Note:**

> This bunny sprung forth from a conversation I had with stir_of_echoes on livejournal a while back about Ezekiel’s true motives and who or what he might turn out being. Whether it makes sense or not I cannot say, but here’s hoping you enjoy my serving of sweet insanity…

He’d been lost…And then found.

Ezekiel was one of the first to fall after Metatron’s spell. Even as the mystical energies swept through Heaven, he understood what was happening. Ezekiel was older and more powerful than most imagined and he’d been at the gates when the energy hit him, ripples of power washing outward from the center of Heaven. Those ripples pushed him through the ethereal planes to where Earth awaited, once more.

As agonizing as the pain was he tried to control his fall, wings aflame with the speed of his descent as he wept. His cries rose and blended with those of the others turning into a concerto of slaughter, anguish, and torture. Far below on the Earth those few gifted humans who could hear their true voices screamed out in prayer across the world as the gates of Heaven locked them out…Forever.

Then there was nothing but darkness.

When Ezekiel came back to himself, he was moving through the world, unseen and unheard by most of humanity. Lost in pain, voice destroyed by the intensity of the fall, and wings damaged to the point they were no more than skeletal remains of energy. This must be what Lucifer felt when he’d fallen, the thought made him weep anew. Yes, Lucifer had done the worst thing any angel could, but were the sins committed worth the agony he’d suffered?

He seemed to wander forever lost to the agony and his thoughts before he found Thomas. It was clear the moment their paths crossed Thomas was a man of faith and purity. He whispered soft in his ear and he heard. Blessed was his humanity for it heard his voice and answered. Ezekiel explained as best he could who he was and what he needed of Thomas and the human man agreed. Finding a vessel was a blessing for he knew there were not enough vessels on Earth to house all his brethren. There had never been so many of them upon the Earth at once and now they circled the planet, their energy playing havoc within the atmosphere.

Time moved different in the Earthly realm and upon entering Thomas, he learned it had been mere days since the fall. Only days he questioned. Only days, Thomas had replied. He tried to shield his vessel from the anguish, but the injuries he’d sustained were far greater than his vessel could heal. He shared as much of his soul as he could, but in the end he began to weaken. It was unlikely Ezekiel would find another and unlike some, he respected humanity.

It was as he exited the bus and heard the prayer he knew what he must do.

***

Dean Winchester wasn’t what he’d expected and yet he was.

Young still by human standards, Ezekiel could see the aged soul within his body. This wasn’t Dean Winchester’s first life upon this plane nor would it be his last. Destiny was a cruel bitch and she continued circling as if dirty water down a drain. Neither was his brother Sam a new soul. Both brothers had suffered numerous lives, struggling always. Castiel had told him of the humans in his charge, eyes aflame with something he’d never witnessed before. He’d always understood Castiel’s fascination with the Winchesters for he was enamored of them as well.

Ezekiel could see the war within Dean Winchester when he proposed what he believed the only way he could save himself, Sam, and Thomas. If he were to take the younger Winchester as a vessel, he could save Thomas from the drain on his soul, heal himself, and heal Sam all in one action. Sam was strong, stronger than one would imagine, created to hold an archangel. Being his vessel should be simple despite his injuries. Most humans would have succumbed by now, yet Sam had not. It gave Ezekiel hope.

He never told Dean his true motives and he could see doubt in his eyes each time he spoke through his brother. It bothered him, yet there was no other way for him to do what he needed. Not to mention he had a soft spot for the Winchesters; men designed to be so much more than simple human beings.

Deep inside, Ezekiel knew what he’d done was trickery, but he doubted Sam would have said yes to him otherwise. Not that long ago the boy had said yes to Lucifer to save the world and he’d paid the price for doing so as had everyone around him. It was for this precise reason he’d told Dean if Sam knew, he could reject him, push him out without a single thought, and if he did so before he was ready Ezekiel had no doubt Sam would die as would he.

Once inside, Ezekiel knew he had his hands full. He told Dean he would erase Sam’s memories of the hospital and he did, but as the days passed, he could feel those memories begin to reconstruct themselves. It seemed impossible such a thing could occur yet it was happening. The memories healing along with the body, Sam’s soul fighting Ezekiel each step of the way, and soon Sam would discover the truth.

He’d made a promise to Dean to protect and heal his brother. Although, he was unsure he would be able to keep that promise now. Ezekiel knew the brothers were special. Hell, all of Heaven had known they were special. This though was something unique. No one should be able to undo what he wrought.

At least no human in history had to his knowledge.

***

It had started in Oregon.

When the demons knocked Sam unconscious, Ezekiel knew there was only one way to protect Sam. His healing was incomplete, yet he’d healed enough to take down the three possessed men before they ended both he and Sam. It hadn’t felt right to take over the boy’s body. There wasn’t enough time to consider any other options though. Once his grace took control of Sam’s body it felt right in far more ways than he cared to admit. He did what he had to do, but he also knew Dean would have to explain and the best explanation was the knife Sam carried. He slit their throats careful not to allow the blood to stain his hands. When Dean appeared, he tried to explain he’d done what he believed Dean wanted, yet he still saw fear in his eyes.

As always, Dean blamed himself for the entire situation. If Ezekiel got out of this particular mess, he planned on tracking down the soul of John Winchester and having a long conversation with him. John never really understood who and what he was destined to be. Abaddon had seen to that when she destroyed the Men of Letters forcing John’s father to travel through time and eventual die at her hands in an attempt to trap her forever.

Nothing had worked out as planned.

***

The next time he knew there was something not quite right was right before Detroit. Sam and Dean had spent days tracking Castiel. Neither of the men were surprised they were being tracked themselves. It turned out to be a rogue reaper working for Bartholomew. He knew Bartholomew was dangerous, more dangerous than Naomi had ever been. Yes, he’d lied to Dean about knowing Naomi. It was a lie of necessity, yet he felt guilty for doing so.

As he stood by and watched Dean torture the reaper he’d felt the reaper’s eyes on Sam. One thing he hadn’t lied about was his ability to know everything Sam knew. He knew the moment the reaper looked on Sam and sensed there was something off about him. It had happened one time before…Being sensed by another. It had been days before when the demon Crowley, self-proclaimed King of Hell and now a prisoner of the Winchesters had looked at Sam in the same way. He’d tried to ignore it, but there was no ignoring it for long. Maybe, the reaper and Crowley didn’t know who he was, but they knew he was there.

***

When they’d discovered Castiel, the reaper holding him put up a decent fight and yet she fell at Dean’s hands. Reapers were never to possess humans, but since Lucifer’s second fall, the balance of energies had gone helter-skelter. Upon learning Lucifer had leashed their master, some decided they no longer feared his wrath. Ezekiel knew though Death was busy hunting down those foolish enough to go rogue and handing out punishment. Those bright enough discovered they could hide from him temporarily if they possessed a human, yet like the angels, they needed permission.

The one who’d captured Castiel had managed to find him even though he’d warded himself against all supernatural creatures. Castiel had always been an intelligent creature, but his downfall was his child like belief he could trust anyone. Ezekiel had doubted Dean when he’d said Castiel was human, fallen with no grace, until they were there in the apartment, the reaper torturing Castiel.

And then it was over, angel blade sliding through Castiel’s abdomen and through his spine, killing him instantly. Reapers did not kill they were meant to collect souls is all. It nauseated Ezekiel and at the first opportunity, he took possession of Sam, approaching Dean who was on the verge of tears at the sight of his friend, lifeless and bloody. He knew what he was about to do would put him as well as Sam in danger, but this was Castiel. He hesitated at the sight of Castiel’s lifeless human form wondering why he had such an affinity for this angel. Among all those in Heaven, he had been the most flawed, the most human. That was why Naomi had been so determined to break him. Time after time, she never succeeded, although she always wiped away his memories. It seemed what Naomi and even he saw as a flawed being in the beginning was something far more.

He’d knelt at Castiel’s side, reached out hand sprawled above wounded flesh and without a second thought, called him back. The light of Heaven shown bright and even as he did it, he felt his energies drain, felt Sam share what little he had to give. Seconds later, he stood stumbling back, room spinning, and collapsed against the wall. As he slid to the floor, room growing dark, he heard Sam’s voice whisper to him.

_He’s my friend._

***

Back at the bunker, he’d come back to himself locked away behind the façade of his vessel. Silent as the grave, from which he’d pulled Castiel, he listened to the brothers greet their friend. There were smiles, laughter, and joy. In these few things, he witnessed Sam’s damaged soul begin to brighten and he understood for one brief moment he’d been as wrong about Sam as he’d been about Castiel. They were both unique and they were the reason Dean Winchester kept going. They were the fuel that always fed the flames of Dean’s own shattered soul. He knew what Dean had gone through. How most would believe he’d only sold his soul to resurrect his brother for selfish reasons. Perhaps, they were right to some extent, but Ezekiel had witnessed the truth and it frightened him like nothing else.

It had not been him healing Castiel. Yes, it was his power, but it had been Sam using him. He’d been a fool to believe he could control the young man, broken as he was, even Lucifer himself had lost control and he had the power of an archangel.

Sam had forced him to up the ante. He’d used what power he could to force his way to the surface and demand Dean have Castiel leave. He’d hit the one button he knew would make Dean chose…Sam. If Castiel didn’t leave, he would and Sam would die. It was unthinkable for Dean to lose his brother. Of course, Ezekiel was unsure if it were true. All he knew was that Castiel (as much as he loved him) could not stay here. If the others were to discover he was here, war would break out on Earth. Not an apocalypse, but something far greater than any prophet had ever recorded.

The pagan gods had been right. They had been here first it was their world no matter what he and his brethren wanted to believe.

***

Weeks passed and Ezekiel continued to linger within in Sam. He appeared less and less for fear Sam would at last put the puzzle pieces together. Now it was obvious to any supernatural being or even a human mutated by magic that Sam was different. They even came to the point of demanding what he was which only confused Sam. The first mistake was when Dean had called him out to resurrect their friend Charlie. Ezekiel had called her back, but he’d been unable to take the complete memory from Sam. He’d remembered Dean calling Ezekiel’s name. Yes, Dean had been able to talk his way out of it, but Sam never forgot. Luckily, Charlie had chosen to walk through the portal to Oz with Dorothy, so that particular secret was lost in the veil.

The second had been the man using shamanistic magic to extend his life indefinitely, fearful of what waited for him on the other side. He’d slit Sam’s throat open and had Ezekiel not appeared he would have died within seconds. Sam had known at that point Dean was keeping something from him, but what it was he had no idea. It wasn’t as if he were stupid. He’d seen the blood on his clothes, yet when he checked himself over there were no wounds and there was too much blood for a simple nosebleed. It was the words the man had spoken, the question he’d asked though that solidified Sam’s suspicions.

 _Don't play coy. I want to know what you are_.

Ezekiel knew his time was coming and he’d tried to escape the inevitable. He worked feverishly inside Sam hoping to wash away the memories. He failed time and again to cleanse Sam’s mind and he knew despite Sam’s physical condition the boy was still powerful. Humans always amazed him, but Sam…well, Sam was something altogether different to be honest. He was fighting Ezekiel with every breath he took and that was beyond amazing, it was unthinkable.

It was also going to be the death of them both and the beginning of the end for this world.

***

Weeks later Jody Mills, an officer of the law and friend who’d seen more than most, contacted the Winchesters with a case. They immediately headed for South Dakota in search of whatever had been killing virgins or rather born again virgins. Had anyone bothered to ask Ezekiel he would have informed them of the culprit’s identity—Vesta, Roman goddess of the hearth.

He was well aware that the pagan gods had gone underground after he and his brethren had arrived to snatch what had once been their world and their worshippers from them. What they’d done was unforgivable in hindsight, but there was no going back and undoing it. Those who’d survived hid from sight, taking what they needed to survive until Lucifer, released from his prison, had tried to bring on the apocalypse along with Michael.

Vesta had been one of the few who refused to join the others who believed they could stop Lucifer and the madness of his Christian apocalypse. She’d saved herself by doing so, but the death of so many of her brethren had driven her mad. She’d finally decided to take what was in her eyes hers to take. When Sam and Jody sought to kill her, the madness had consumed her, made her careless, and in the moment she had tried to consume Sam she’d seen the truth. She’d also spoken the truth.

The internal battle Ezekiel was fighting with Sam’s soul had left his body in ruins within and Vesta had seen it for what it was. She never had the chance to say anything further when Jody had killed her with the oak stake stained with virgin blood. Jody hadn’t killed her soon enough though. She’d spoken and Sam had heard although her words only confused him further.

Afterward, Ezekiel had listened as Sam voiced his fears to his brother and the agony in his voice had broken his brother’s heart. That was when Ezekiel had surged forward determined to stop Dean from telling Sam the truth. He was cruel and heartless when he threatened Dean with Sam’s death not because he wanted to, but because in that moment he was certain that without his presence Sam would die. They’d been feeding off one another during their internal battle and now Sam was nothing except _safety pins and duct tape_ as Vesta had put it. His body was fading, yet his soul was burning bright in an attempt to continue living. His body was nothing except an ashen log ready to disintegrate at the first brush of a random breeze just as Ezekiel’s wings were ragged and decimated. The last thing Ezekiel had ever wanted was Sam to die. It hadn’t been his intention, but now he understood his error in judgment.

As he sank deep into the vessel he’d claimed as his own he thought of Thomas, the man who’d carried him in his time of need and wondered what he would think. He’d known the truth of who Ezekiel was and why he hid from the angels banished from Heaven. The courtesy of a true choice though he’d never offered to Sam. Perhaps, if he had, he might have agreed to help Ezekiel of his own free will. Now though they would never know. Ezekiel was shamed. A human boy, who’d never wished for anything except a safe life away from the dark and wicked things of the world, had shamed him.

***

Twenty-four hours later, after driving in silence, Sam and Dean pulled off the beaten track and onto the back roads to the only place, Ezekiel felt safe. Had he been human he would have sighed. Here within the warded walls of the bunker he feared nothing except the inevitable fact Sam would soon know he was inside him no matter the threats he leveled against Dean.

He watched and listened in the stillness. The light of Sam’s abused soul his only companion and he wondered how a soul so devastated could shine so brilliant in a body shattered by the things it had experienced. Focusing inward as Sam prepared for bed, Ezekiel let the shadows flitting through the light close in around him. He needed to rest, as did Sam. They both needed to rest.

***

Ezekiel found himself standing in a yard with a suddenness that shocked him. He looked down at the body so familiar, yet it wasn’t Sam’s body, it was Thomas. It took him a moment to realize this was what the humans called the dream world. He was familiar with this place, a dimension somewhere between Heaven and Earth, far removed from Hell and Purgatory, where the human soul drifted as its physical vessel rested in a deep sleep. Angels often visited humans here, as did loved ones who had passed from the physical world. It was a place of calm, peace, and contemplation where a mere thought formed the illusions surrounding them.

He wasn’t alone. This place was not of his making.

There was a two story suburban house, beautiful manicured lawn, and a sky blue enough to put Heaven to shame. The colors were vibrant, crisper than any color on Earth and at the end of the sidewalk leading to the front door stood Sam. He was staring up at the house, eyes filled with wonder.

“This is where it all began.” Voice soft, he turned to where Ezekiel stood. “Seems pretty damned normal doesn’t it?”

Ezekiel hesitated to answer. What could he say that wouldn’t seem self-serving or forced? He’d never expected this. How had Sam drawn him here into this place least of all wrapped him in the illusion of Thomas when he’d never seen Ezekiel in that particular vessel?

Turning back to the house, the corner of Sam’s lips tipped in a desolate smile. “Do you prefer the name Ezekiel?”

Eyebrows raised in surprise he approached Sam like one would approach a wounded animal. After all wasn’t he a wounded animal. “That is my name.”

A huff of laughter escaped Sam. “Have you forgotten who you’re talking to?”

“Who am I talking to?” Ezekiel eyed Sam with trepidation.

Sam’s smile widened. “I’ll tell you my name if you tell me yours.”

It was then Ezekiel realized that Sam knew his secret. Of course, he should have understood if anyone could figure it out it was one of the Winchesters. He was surprised Dean hadn’t figured it out. If he considered the situation with more care though he would have seen Dean blinded by panic. Sam had been dying and if there was one thing anyone who knew the Winchesters understood it was Dean loved his brother, needed him, so fucking much he would do anything to save him.

“I think you already know who I am, Sam.”

Thoughtful expression in his eyes, Sam started to walk up the sidewalk toward the door of the house. “It’s weird you know…Dean was the one who Mom told stories of angels to, but I’m the one who believed until Castiel came into our lives. Dean still didn’t want to believe it was true and to be honest I don’t blame him considering Castiel is the only one we’ve met outside of Anna who wasn’t a douche bag.”

Ezekiel sighed, following Sam toward the door. “You shouldn’t blame them. Sometimes the actions of others destroy the faith of those who are left behind to clean up the pieces.”

“Castiel never lost his faith in the beginning.” Sam pointed out as they stopped at the bottom of the stairs leading to the front door. “It wavered, but no matter what he never forgot who he was and what he’d been created for.”

“He has always had faith in his creator, more than any other in Heaven, but he was considered flawed.”

Sam looked to Ezekiel eyes narrow, anger clear in their hazel depths, “Flawed because he understood humans far better than you?”

Gaze averted to the ground, Ezekiel felt the urge to weep. He deserved Sam’s anger and his heart ached with the truth of what he’d done.

Stepping closer, Sam sighed. “I understand how it feels to want to escape, to hide from reality. I tried more than once and it never works. All it does is catch up with you. Bite you in the ass. The end result is never pretty.”

“You don’t understand.” He whispered beneath his breathe.

“Then make me understand. It’s the least you can do after all the suffering you’ve caused my family.”

Sam’s words hit him where it hurt. Why had he run away? He’d been gone so long he wasn’t even sure why he’d done so. Gabriel had run, but he knew why he had and he’d clung to his love of the humans until his wings turned to ash at the end of his brother’s blade. Ezekiel had felt Gabriel’s death and he’d mourned. Yet, he’d remained hidden. It wasn’t until Metatron had decided to punish them all that he’d found the strength to return to Heaven. He hadn’t gotten to the gates in time though. He’d felt the grief so sharp piercing his ethereal flesh as the spell had pushed him back to Earth.

“I had hoped to stop the war.”

“The apocalypse?”

Ezekiel shook his head. “No, the second war in Heaven.”

“A second war in Heaven…The bible doesn’t say anything about a second war.”

With a snort, Ezekiel dropped to the steps, face cradled in his hands. “I never imagined Metatron would grieve so deep. I never imagined he would be the one to start the war.”

Sam sat down next to him. “How do we stop it? Crowley said there was no way to reverse the spell Metatron cast.”

Ezekiel lifted his head, tears streaking his face. “He’s wrong. And it’s too late to stop it from starting. The war has already begun the angels are slaughtering one another even as we speak.”

“But there has to be away. After all you’re…”

Ezekiel lifted his hand form morphing to one Sam was familiar with. Eyes going wide Sam smiled although there was no humor in his eyes. He should have known the truth.

“How could you?” Ezekiel questioned as he morphed back into the visage of Thomas.

“How did you know?”

With a world-weary sigh, Ezekiel stood. “I’m inside your body and mind. All you know I know. Your brother allowed me to do this for the right reasons, but I lied to him, Sam. If I’d told him the truth, he would have never bent to my will. All he wanted was his brother back.”

“Then what is the truth. I know who you are now. I can make a choice or I can send you packing.”

Running his fingers through his hair, Ezekiel contemplated facing what he’d caused, “Fine. I’ll tell you the truth and I will leave it up to you, Sam, to make the decision.”

“Then do it.” Sam stood up, sky above them going from sunny to stormy in a split second.

“First the Lamb and then the Lion…Do you understand?”

Sam’s eyes lit with understanding.

“My power can only walk the Earth within a vessel. I have moved from one to another for millennia, since the last vessel was born there has not been another that could contain my power…”

“…Until me.” Sam finished.

“You must surrender totally and I cannot promise if you will survive the battle.”

“Yes, the answer is yes.”

“You understand?”

Sam nodded.

Ezekiel smiled through sorrowful eyes. “You see, Sam. Even God can have a destiny he cannot escape.”

  
The End…?


End file.
